The virus that shall remain nameless

I am so sick of the virus currently causing pandemic and pandemonium that I have decided I will stop referring to it by name. And I hate seeing that little pop art figure that is used to signify a story on the virus is about to occur.

About to occur? That is the entire news nowadays. Pandemic this, pandemic that, and how people are bad at sheltering in place and the president is a nincompoop and bring on Dr. Fauci who we all respect and believe. And why isn’t New York Governor Cuomo the president? He seems to know what he’s doing and he seems to love us all.

But enough of that virus that shall remain nameless. Instead, I’m going to talk about what’s been going on at my house since I began social distancing.

To begin with, social distancing wasn’t difficult for me because I’m somewhat of a social distancer by nature. I actually like being alone with myself. I read, watch TV, putter, check out Facebook and read some more.

That was the first week.

But we’re getting serious now. I have to put some thought into  what I want to buy at the grocery store because I don’t want to be in there that long.  And if I’m standing on the sidewalk raking leaves off the garden, I scurry back to the driveway when I see a dog walker on the horizon. And, yes, I’m going through soap like it’s water. Way to keep those hands clean.

So yesterday, I finally re-potted my geraniums. I scrubbed the grease off the stove top and tried to clean the stove grates. (Anyone have a good solution for the black burned-on grease I can’t get off those grates?) I plunged the kitchen sink and then wiped down all surfaces and did the dishes. I even made some keto cornbread that tastes nowhere near as delicious as the cornbread I buy from Festival’s deli. I guess that’s because it’s keto.

Today, I braved shopping at Festival. That darned cornbread that didn’t taste that good took four eggs so I really needed to supplement. But all the eggs except for organic were sold out and the organics cost over $4 a dozen.

No thanks.

So I drove by Kwik Trip on the way home to get eggs for $1.99 a dozen and noticed that gas is selling for $1.42. Are you kidding me? Now that I’m not going anywhere, gas is a dollar cheaper than it was a month ago.

I polished off my energy supply by going for a bike ride at 2 p.m. Yes, it had started to drizzle so I only lasted out there for 10 minutes because that is uncomfortable and, as a retiree, I crave comfort.

So I’m wimping out for the rest of the day and going to the book stack on the dining room table.

So much to do, so much time in which to do it, so much social isolation. Wave if you see me in the yard, but don’t come anywhere near me. Because, you know, there’s this virus thing.




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